TRUST US

My parents treat me like a kidSalam Guru,Every Friday I eagerly wait for Us to read my favourite column. I am a 20-year-old student of final year B.A. I am studying in one of the prestigious colleges of Karachi. I have two older sisters who are married and well-settled. Now I am the focal point of my parents’ life. It’s not that they are not caring and loving but they are way too over protective about me. They don’t allow me to go anywhere without supervision. It seems they don’t trust me. I have to take their permission wherever I go and this thing is bothering me too much. My second problem is that whenever we entertain at our place, I am always the one who has to take care of every single thing, from the house chores to the noisy children to cleaning up after the guests leave. I feel more of a servant than their child. Even when we go over to some relative’s place I have to be in the kitchen to help the hosts out. How should I tell my parents that I don’t like it? Also, I am very fond of singing and I sing in college functions. I want to take music lessons by an ustaad but don’t have the guts to tell my parents about my passion. Do you think I should talk to them? Please help. Not a little Girl Dear Not a little Girl,I can comprehend your problem but, dear, you need to understand that for parents their children will always remain kids no matter how grown-up they are. They are concerned about you and hence they may appear protective to you. You are still in college and as parents they believe it is their responsibility to watch your comings and goings. So, don’t feel upset. In fact, you should feel happy to have people who are there to look after you.Coming to your second problem, I think there is no harm in doing household chores. It will be good for you in future. You shouldn’t mind it if your parents tell you to help others in the kitchen. Actually, they are trying to inculcate good manners in you. So, don’t think they treat you as a servant. They just want you to be a responsible adult. Thirdly, if you want to polish your singing skills then you have to talk to your parents about your passion. I am sure they will encourage you. Good luck! I am studying against my willDear Guru,I am a regular reader of your column. I am a 19-year-old girl and a student of MBBS (first year). My problem is I have no understanding with my parents. They have forced me into getting admission in a medical college. I don’t want to be a doctor. Can you imagine how difficult it is for me to study something I am not interested in? Plus, they never listen to what I want to do. I am interested in fine arts and have a natural flair for paintings, but my parents say that it has no value and artists have no careers. My parents are really biased; my brother has every freedom, but I don’t have any liberty. No matter what I do, I am never appreciated by my parents. I am so upset. What should I do?Agitated Lass Dear Agitated Lass,Well, if you are so passionate about becoming an artist instead of a doctor, then it’s better to talk your parents now rather than continue studying against your will.You need to muster courage to pursue what you really like instead of doing something half-heartedly. You can sort out your issue with your parents amicably through dialogue. They may be right in their justification of not letting you pursue art as a career but what they don’t realize is that you can excel in your field if you are good at it. And you can also make good money in your chosen profession, too. Actually, it’s not about choosing lucrative careers but about how good you are in a certain field. So, make an effort and let your parents know how enthusiastic you are about art. Show them your art work. Persuade them to let you take admission in an art college. I know you may have to waste one year, in case you get admission in an art college, but it is much better than wasting your talent and precious years in doing something you are not interested in. Hopefully your parents will come around. Good luck!Kindly send your problems at: trustusproblems@yahoo.com 

from The News International - US http://bit.ly/2CZRk6p