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Why is it so hard to make friends?Greetings Guru,I am a 14-year –old teen and I have a rather peculiar problem. Actually, I happen to be a shy person and I don’t know how to make friends. I usually feel awkward around people. I have different interests than those of my class fellows and since I don’t share common interests, I find it difficult to talk to my classmates. They like to discuss dramas, films, or rather drama queens, but I have no interest in all these frivolous things. When I try to be nice, people seem to take advantage of my kindness. And when I try to defend myself they think that I am being rude. That is why I struggle with making friends. Why is it so hard to make friends? Am I the problem?Struggling SophomoreDear Struggling Sophomore,One needs friends in one’s life - you enjoy with them and they are the ones who support you when you are down. However, making friends is tricky for shy people. Since you are the reserved type, you find it difficult to make friends. But dear, you can also make friends if you put in a little extra effort. You have to keep your shyness aside and to talk to people. Even if you are not interested in what your class fellows are interested in, still try to listen what they are talking about. If you are open and welcoming towards others, they will also start noticing you. You’ve got to make small talk and see if you connect with someone. Start with a question like “I like your top, where’d you get it?” “That sandwich looks delish! What is it? ” Chances are they will ask you a question too. Just allow the connection to keep flowing. It’s a lot of work that can’t be rushed. Having said that, you don’t have to become someone else just to find friends, but if what you’ve been doing isn’t working, consider finding a new group on social media that shares your ideas or activities. One of the easiest ways to make friends is to join a club or group around an interest that you have. You are still young and hopefully your shyness will be totally gone once you enter college. As for dealing with others, it is good that you are kind and helpful, but you should not be fooled by others. However, you will learn the ways of the world with the passage of time. Good luck! I want to cosplay the charactersSalam Guru,I am a ninth grade student and I want to do something different with my life. I am tired of the same boring hobbies everyone has. I watch different cartoon and animes and I want to cosplay the characters, but that requires time and energy and above all permission. With the matriculation system I don’t have time for it, but I really want to do it. My family is also not supporting the idea. What should a hopeless teenager do?Oppressed OtakuDear Oppressed Otaku,I really appreciate your desire to do something different. I admire your fun-loving streak, but you need to understand that these are your crucial years as far as your studies are concerned. Your whole future depends on your ninth grade result. You don’t have much leisure time in your hand to devote to your hobby, so it’s better if you postpone the idea of cosplaying the characters for some time and focus on your studies. You can always pursue your hobby in your summer holidays. Good luck!I have a crush on my best friend’s boyfriend Salam Guru,I am an 18-year-old girl and I have a crush on this boy who lives in my neighbourhood. He is also my best friend’s boyfriend. I really like him but I don’t want to hurt my friend. Although this guy is unaware of my feelings for him, I am sure he likes me a lot. Once I left a love card on his desk in college and my best friend saw it and we had a really bad fight. After that I never tried it again. Please help me. I can’t stop thinking about him.Confused CancerDear Confused Cancer,I just fail to understand what makes you think that this guy likes you. May be he likes you just as a friend. And what type of friend are you? You are interested in your friend’s boyfriend? Isn’t it unethical and indecent? Girl, please wake up and have a reality check. Put yourself in your friend’s shoes and then think. How would you feel if your best friend tried to snatch your boyfriend? Dear, it’s all right to have crushes but it’s not ok to go beyond that. Good luck!Kindly send your problems at: trustusproblems@yahoo.com

from The News International - US https://ift.tt/2ChOnP3