Be a bride, not a bridezilla!

heart-to-heartFeeling anxious and sick to your stomach before your wedding? Well, I feel the same these days as the ‘big day’ is just round the corner... It is very natural to have cold feet before the wedding day approaches and you might have mixed emotions about it. As in, whether was it a right decision to say yes or should I run away before the day comes, you wonder... However, often you feel better and your anxiety finds other reasons to take a toll on you. For instance, if your siblings, cousins or friends are not participating to their last breath or your shadi ka jora turned out to be something you didn’t imagine, you become a bridezilla and then everyone around has to bear with you and your mood swings. Also, it could be your partner’s annoyances getting to you, like a sink full of dishes you asked someone to put away multiple times to no avail, or feeling panicky over 200 out-of-town guests flying in, or an argument you had with your family over the venue and now you are having trouble sleeping or eating regular meals. While this is not healthy, it can be normal. You are about to make a commitment for the rest of your life and you are staring that notion right in the eye.Here’s a checklist of some of the fears most brides-to-be encounter, including me...Am I ready for marriage?It can be all too easy to get swept up in the romance of a marriage proposal when that huge sparkling diamond is staring you in the face.Likewise, the whirlwind of wedding planning can sometimes hinder your true feelings about the relationship you’re in, as you’re totally consumed by planning your big day.You might take a moment before your wedding day and question if you’re ready to commit to someone in the most serious way there is.Marriage might have been the last thing on your mind before they popped the question, so be true to yourself and ask if you’re ready for this level of commitment.What if they’re not the one?This is possibly the biggest worry you could be harbouring in the lead up to your big day; what if the person you’re marrying isn’t ‘the one’?After all, your wedding vows declare that you will spend the rest of your life with this person, so it’s kind of important that they’re the right person for you.Whether you’re a believer in soul mates and destiny or not, the only way to put your worries to bed is to reassure yourself that you love your partner and that you want to grow old with them. If not, then now’s the time to speak up. Especially as researchers have found 19 per cent of women who said they had pre-wedding doubts were divorced four years later.Will I be able to manage my future home?Pre-wedding jitters are something very normal. But the reason is not just anxiety of entering into a new phase of life. There are certain thoughts, fear, misconceptions and even insecurities which become the reason of having a jittery feeling before you tie the knot. I have always been very independent after my parents’ death. I got myself pretty occupied with work, friends and family. I often get busy with relatives coming from abroad and staying at my place. I hired cooks and maids to deal with the house chores, since after coming from work I can’t manage cooking. However, home management is something which never felt like a task to me. However, I am feeling quite nervous about house chores and managing my own place after marriage. I am not sure will I be able to cook without my cook’s assistance. Does this mark the end of an era?Some soon-to-be husbands or wives may be feeling apprehensive before their wedding day as they fear it will mark the end of an era with their family.If you are particularly close with your parents or siblings, or if getting married means you’ll be leaving your family home (or even the country), then you might be feeling saddened by the prospect of ‘saying goodbye’ to your family.In this circumstance, you must see your wedding day as just another step in life - not necessarily a step away from your family.Weddings and marriage are an addition - a growth and a new beginning.What would it be like sharing the same room?As it’s been almost eight years alone with my brother at home, I have almost forgotten how it feels like to be around so many people. Even if I go to meet relatives for a while, I often get homesick and want to return to my place and my room. It’s almost like you become isolated when you lead an independent life. You want your cosy room where you want to spend some me time or do whatever you want without anybody’s interference. The thought of sharing my room with someone and having an almost stranger by my side feels weird! I don’t know how it will be... Sharing my cupboard, my bathroom and everything which I never even imagined to give up gives me chills down my spine.

from The News International - You http://bit.ly/2Tc4RhK